Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. ~Tom Wilson
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
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